Week 7 – Sunday 13th February – Cardiff Students' Union: The Great Hall, Cardiff – NME Shockwaves Tour (Crystal Castles, Magnetic Man, Everything, Everything, The Vaccines) - £16.59
“So, do you think they are the saviours of Rock ‘n’ Roll?”
I’d failed.
On my return a Sunday night gig seemed like the ideal conclusion to a heavy few days.
We were back at Cardiff University’s Great Hall for the second time this year, but this time You Me At Six were sadly nowhere to be seen. On show instead, were the four acts that make up this year’s NME Shockwaves Tour. All four have had plenty of hype surrounding them, none more so than opening act The Vaccines, to whom Sandro’s question related.
“No,” I answered bluntly. “There’s only one band that can save Rock ‘n’ Roll, and The Old Trafford Trio will never sell out.”
We’d been to the same event, at the same venue a year ago to the day. On that occasion The Maccabees were superb headliners, and they were ably supported by Bombay Bicycle Club. The Big Pink played some heavily distorted, ear-aching fuzz and opening the show were “The Next Big Thing” that year, The Drums, a band whose name could confuse even the most intelligent of simpletons, as I’d found out a few days later.
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“Did you enjoy the gig?” I asked a friend who’d attended separately.
“Yeah it was great. The Maccabees were really good.”
“What did you think of The Drums?” I asked, to which she looked slightly bemused.
“Err, I wasn’t really close enough to the stage to see. What were they like?”
Equally bemused, it took me about four days to figure out she’d misunderstood my question. My answer of: “They were ok, not the most interesting in the world,” probably left her thinking I was some kind of authority on percussion instruments.
It turned out she had only heard of The Maccabees and had missed the other bands. After I raised my eyebrows and said, “How about The Big Pink, eh?” she never spoke to me again.
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Along with The Vaccines, this year’s alliterative lineup included Everything Everything, Magnetic Man and Crystal Castles. Sandro and I headed to pre-gig venue The Woodville via taxi, and we were joined by Ryan of Brum (of Week 3 fame) and his better half Jess of Brum. There we met a kindred spirit of mine, fellow sloth Jimbo Richards and his better three quarters Melbo Richards, who sadly wouldn’t be joining us at the gig due to a terrible illness known as pregnancy.
Ryan of Brum offered Sandro a pint, then turned to me, checked his watch and decided it was safe to offer me one too.
At The Great Hall our growing posse was joined by Gigaweek stalwart P. Mushy who was accompanied by two mysterious figures known as The La’s. No, not the Scouse band, but Gavla and Brynla, or Gavlova and Flapjack as they shall be known henceforth. Also in attendance were J. Meaty and his missus, and the fabulous Nadinho and his fiancé. Contrary to popular belief, the fabulous Nadinho is not a magician, he is however a goalkeeper renowned in the South Wales area for his stylish handling. It didn’t surprise me to see he was wearing his goalkeeping gloves.
We were in safe hands with The Vaccines first up, a good old fashioned guitar band who’ve had so much hype surrounding them they’d be immune to my criticism even if I were inclined to give any. They may not be the saviours of Rock ‘n’ Roll or guitar driven music in general (few can match Terry Phelan’s guitar solos), but they’re definitely gonna be big.
Even with my finger very much off the pulse, I’d heard their first two singles ('Wreckin' Bar (Ra Ra Ra)' and 'Post Break-Up Sex') on a couple occasions and it was obvious they had an ear for a tune. Live they sounded even better, and I could be found bobbing my head like the Churchill dog to them as they casually kicked off proceedings.
As well as 'Wreckin’ Bar' and 'Post Break-Up Sex' they played a couple of other songs that stuck in my head, namely 'We’re Happening' and 'If You Wanna.' Thankfully they’ve become unstuck since, and the 'Witch Doctor' song has reclaimed its rightful place between my ears, but I was never less than entertained throughout their set. I might have said that The Vaccines are Britain’s answer to The Strokes, if I didn’t think at least four people had already said the same thing. Interestingly enough both bands have albums out in March, so no doubt the fifth and sixth person will make that rubbish comparison soon enough.
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Following The Vaccines were Everything Everything. I missed part of their first song due to a toilet break (I broke the toilet), and on my return I was shocked at just how young they all looked. It takes a lot to shock me (I’ve seen Sandro naked), but these guys looked younger than me, and I was ID’d recently when I went to see Fred The Movie. I’m kidding of course, I wouldn’t watch such nonsense. It was Gnomeo and Juliet.
Ryan of Brum suggested that the singer looked like one of the actors from the children’s film Scream.
“David Arquette?” I suggested.
“No, not him, the other one” Ryan said shaking his head.
“Skeet Ulrich?” I offered knowledgably.
“Who? No, not Pete or Rick,” he replied.
“The Fonz?” I guessed.
“No, not Henry Wrinkly,” he answered.
“You mean Winkler?” I corrected.
“That’s a bit harsh, I liked Happy days,” Ryan said, visibly offended.
Shrugging off my bemusement, the resemblance finally dawned on me. “Matthew Lillard!?” I declared, “whose best role was as Shaggy in Scooby Doo!”
“That’s him!” Ryan confirmed happily.
“I can see it now, but he’s a bit short.”
“He’s like a short, squashed-faced Matthew Lillard,” Ryan said with glee.
Who wouldn’t be flattered by that comparison?
The fact that conversation was more memorable to me than all but one of the band’s songs shouldn’t be held against them. Everyone Everyone enjoyed their performance. Except for Flapjack Flapjack. The song that I can clearly remember, 'Photoshop Handsome' was their final one and it’s a cracker, even if I did think they were singing about Argos until Ryan corrected me later.
Shame, “Argos! What have you done with my order?” is so much more emotive than “Airbrush! What have you done with my father?” don’t you think? I suppose the clue was in the title.
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Following Everything Everything, the masses were drawn to the stage by the appearance of Magnetic Man, a dubstep trio who had a top five charting album last year. Among our posse they polarised opinion. Sandro found the dreadlocked MC particularly attractive, but others found the seated DJs repellent. . . A bit forced? Guilty as charged.
Forgive me.
Personally, it felt strange to watch three guys on laptops with another fella wandering around them on stage with a microphone. We speculated as to whether they were actually just playing Football Manager or Counter Strike, oblivious to the jubilant scenes in front of them. Were they actually doing anything that couldn’t have been pre-programmed onto the laptops beforehand? Who knows?
It must be said that despite our reservations, Magnetic Man won the crowd almost completely. I hadn’t seen scenes like this since a young pop-punk post-hardcore band took the same room by storm, but this was on an even bigger scale. Fans of the genre would have absolutely loved it (I’m reliably informed), while even others as wet behind the ears as myself could appreciate the merits of somthing like 'Anthemic.'
You could say that those with a positive attitude were drawn in, while those with a negative attitude were forced to the outskirts, but that would be pushing it. Even at those edges, there were many moments when the bass was phenomenal, literally causing our vulnerable noses to shake.
It was the closest thing to a rave Gigaweek is likely to involve, with strobe lighting more prevalent than in the average episode of Skins, and in the interlude between tunes at one point the MC invited everyone to raise phones, lighters or, if you were really lucky, the mini torch on your key ring (I got a lot of envious glance I can promise you) above our heads.
“That’s one way to distract us from the music. . .” one particularly grumpy bastard said. Nearly everybody else however was energetically positive, jumping and whooping. The MC provoked huge cheers at the mere mention of our fair city's name.
“Wait til he says Nando’s,” Sandro warned.
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We’ve all been the mover and the shifter, some of us moving more than others, others shifting more often than moving. The mover politely thanks or apologises to the shifter, and perhaps lays a grateful hand on his or her
And yet, some people just don’t abide. Put simply, if you make the decision to simply barge past someone in the crowd to get to your final destination quicker, potentially knocking that person off balance or into someone else, and more than likely causing a spillage of some kind, then you shouldn’t expect any sympathy if you then feel the blow of a plastic bottle from J. Meaty to the back of the head. It would be wrong of me to say I condone such retribution. Instead I’ll say I encourage it. And maybe you can bite their nose off while you’re at it. The Dude abides to gig etiquette, so should you.
Electronic duo Crystal Castles were the night’s headliners, and they were gonna have to go some to top Magnetic Man, who in terms of noise levels had thrown everything (including a fridge) but the kitchen sink at the crowd. A guy briefly introduced them and explained that they’d been advised to stop touring after the singer Alice Glass had broken her ankle a few weeks earlier.
They played regardless and she was supported by a crutch. The other half of the duo was a dude in a hoodie who goes by the name of Ethan Kath. As P. Mushy pointed out, he basically does everything while she provides barely distinguishable vocals, but P. Mushy is known for his Richardkeysesque male chauvinism.
By the time they played I was physically and mentally drained, and wasn’t really in the frame of mind to enjoy a level of noise that had barely decreased from the cacophony created by Magnetic Man or the continuing strobing effects, but I did enjoy a tune called 'Not in Love' which briefly brought my mind back to the present, and replaced the incessant 'ooh eeh, ooh ah aah, ting tang, walla walla bing bang' in my head. Gavlova and Flapjack threw in the towel long before the end, and retreated to The Pen and Wig, and Sandro was set to join them before Crystal Castles played their encore.
He was compelled to stay however after I mentioned the
Guitar music may not have been saved, but Gigaweek had.
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29-4 - The Joy Formidable - ✓
5-11 – Jonny - ✓
12-18 - NME Shockwaves Tour (Crystal Castles, Magnetic Man, Everything, Everything, The Vaccines) - ✓
19-25 –Les Savy Fav
12-18 - NME Shockwaves Tour (Crystal Castles, Magnetic Man, Everything, Everything, The Vaccines) - ✓
19-25 –Les Savy Fav
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